Baby

So I am writing this blog with weary eyes and a tired head, after being up all night with Agnes trying to sooth our baby boy who seems to have wind and is a bit uncomfortable.
So no sleep.

But I have to praise God for no sleep because the reason for no sleep is our little child.
For those who don't know, last Friday Aggie gave birth to a little baby boy, who we have named Ethan Lewis Vandenberg.

He has very light skin and looks a lot like I did as a baby! Although he has Aggie's hair color and Aggie's African nose.

We went into the hospital on Friday morning for  a check up, but after examining Agnes the doctor said that the baby is very ready to come, and so they induced her there.
Unfortunately Andrew just missed out on seeing our baby, as he left to go to Kampala on Friday morning! Typical, since he was waiting and hoping he would get to see the baby the whole time he was here.
But Friday was the day Ethan wanted to come.

Aggie was in labor from 12.00 to 7.00 pm.
Ethan came quite fast in the end, from about 6.30 it was all on, and the doctors barely had time to get her into the delivery room and ready before Ethan's head started popping out.

It was the most intense thing I have ever gone through (and I am sure Aggie could say the same haha)

Ethan was born very healthy, weighing in at 3.5 kilos.
The first thing I noticed about him was his eyes. I have never seen a new born with such active, wide open eyes.

It actually was all a little bit scary, because Agnes was on the delivery bed for about 45 minutes after giving birth.
She had some complications with the placenta not coming out, and so the doctors had to hurry and find the anesthetist to be able to put Aggie under so they could work on her.
During this time they kind of whisked me away to another room to be with Ethan. They never really explained to me what was happening, all I knew was that there was some problems with the placenta and that they needed to put Aggie to sleep to work on her.
When I asked the Ugandan nurse if Aggie would be ok, in the typical blunt and casual way which can be normal among African nurses, she simply said "Yes she is ok, but if they leave her too long she could bled to death"
I've never been more scared in my life! And I have never prayed harder in my life as well.

Afterwards I got to learn that it can be quite common for this to happen to women during delivery, and that with the very skilled doctors in the modern hospital we were at, Aggie was in good hands and they had it under control.

But we still praise God that He protected Agnes and the baby. And although Aggie is quite sore now with a lot of stitches, she is happy and doing well (although very tired after last night)

It was an amazing experience to be with Aggie as well, and to be there by her side. There was actually a funny moment (in hindsight ... not at the time) where the Ugandan nurse tried to make me leave the delivery room during birth.
In the culture here men never attend the birth of their children, but leave the women alone with other women.
The nurse told me I have to leave now, to which I said "No I am going to be here with my wife" .. She looked at me strangely and said that I have to talk to the doctor about it (our doctor is a lovely woman from Turkey) to which I told her that we had already organized it with her.
I had to just let her know very firmly that it may not be a part of her culture, but this is the decision we had made, and we want to be together for it.
A few strange looks, but hey no one was getting rid of me from that room! Aggie told me afterwards she was so glad I was there, because she was so zoned out from the pain, she didn't understand or hear anything the doctor was saying, and she was taking all her cues from me (as I repeated to her what the doctor wanted her to do)

I am very proud of Aggie, she did so well! And she didn't have any form of pain killers throughout the whole ordeal. Straight up dealt with the pain on her own (with some help from my massages)

And I should say, that it is official ... Women are stronger then men.

We are both looking forward to the joys of parenthood. And although we can be scared and nervous at times (Ethan seems to hate having nappies changed, and hates being bathed ... which Agnes finds hard) I think we are doing well.
Especially considering we have had no classes or training or anything in how to deal with a baby. The hospital doesn't really do that here either.

We were out of the hospital the next day at lunch time, and sent home to start trying to work out how this parenting thing works.

The good thing here about the culture is that Aggie and I are not alone. We live in a big house with many women (some who have their own children) and so there is always someone to take the baby and give us a rest. Plus Aggie's sisters are doing all the cooking and washing so that Aggie doesn't have to lift a finger (which is good, because she is still struggling to walk around)

Mum has also been here staying with us, which has been a real blessing. She has helped Aggie a lot in showing us how to bath, change nappies, feed, burp etc.
And the good thing about Mum is that she is not forceful like the Ugandans in our house ... who just take the baby from your hands and say this is how it should be done (which Aggie and I get a little frustrated at)
Mum simply gives us advice and watches over us and helps us where we need, while we do it ourselves.

I know Mum is over the moon about her first grandchild, and Aggie and I both love having her support here.

So now we begin the long journey of Parenthood! What a huge change to our lives. But what a huge change that will be such a great blessing!

We thank everyone who has loved and supported us, prayed for us and sent us messages.
May God bless you.

The other day I read this passage in church, and also showed it to mum. I thought it was beautiful.

Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers. Proverbs 17:6